Andrew and I were talking the other day about the events that unfolded for us in 2018. First and foremost – 2018 will go down as the year the boys were born. But if I had to summarize it another way, I would without a doubt, dub it the year I hosted a baptism party instead of a wine party. My focus for 2018 was uncharted territory for me as we got ready for and brought home two sweet baby boys. Instead of planning the annual holiday wine party I look forward to every year; I hosted an awesome baptism party. Instead of waking up on my own accord and going for a run; I have found myself either sleeping uncomfortably or being awakened at 3am by a fussy baby. Instead of Andrew and me casually cooking dinner with a bottle of wine in the evenings; we now scarf down food in fear of a baby waking. Instead of setting out on the weekends with no plans other than to make memories; we now have to be strategic about feedings and naps. At the end of the day – even when I had days where I was just over being pregnant or the boys are being extra challenging; I can still look at Andrew and smile at the life we have and the family we have made.
I have never bought into the New Year’s Resolution concept. It just so happens, however, that with new babies, a new position at work, and the continuation of relationships – it seemed to be the right time to purposefully think about my priorities and how to make each day more meaningful than the previous. Also, Andrew committed to me early in our relationship to support me being the best person I can be. If I don’t have a vision for growth for myself, it seems unfair to hold him to that!
During my pregnancy, and even for the few months after (so, most of 2018), I purposely tried to not be extremely rigid with my nutrition or exercise. Historically – I have been driven to fall in line with one diet or another and follow one training plan or another. With my “all or nothing” mentality – that meant I was either being consumed by the thought of food and pressure of working out; or eating an entire pizza and spending way too much time scrolling social media on my phone.
At times, it was actually scary to feel like I didn’t have control over my body since I was not tracking anything or marking workouts complete. For the most part, however, it was freeing to just live and not overthink every decision I made when I went out to eat or beat myself up if my run was slower than I expected. So for 2019 – I am hoping to continue the same approach. I am taking a step back from making traditional SMART goals and instead, keeping the following concepts at the forefront.
1. Stay away from the scale.
a. I don’t want to say I only want to check every month, or something like that, but I know I do not want to start of every morning by stepping on the scale. That either leads to me being happy about the number and starting off a good day or not being happy about the number and letting it ruin the day right away. Not a new concept – but this number should not define how willing I am to allowing myself to feel happy and energized.
2. Make baby food.
a. I did not (could not?) breast feed for as long or as well as I originally thought. I want to make the boys’ food because there is a part of me that I think will feel good to make that effort. Sure, I know there will be prepared baby food bought and used; but if I am home making food for them – then I like to think it will also encourage healthy choices for myself and Andrew.
3. Go to church.
a. I would like to say we will go every weekend. That won’t happen. But – I do think we can make it a priority to think about this every weekend and determine in general – how we can be more open to strengthening our faith.
4. Run the Urban Bourbon Half Marathon.
a. I do have SMART goals here…
i. 1. Run sub 2 hours
ii. 2. Run 10 minute mile average
iii. 3. Finish
5. Spend meaningful time with Andrew.
a. Before twins – we spent a lot of time together. After twins – we spend a lot of time together. The difference, however, is the energy we put towards each other has decreased as we now have two tiny humans that take a lot of energy. I am not sure if this means set date nights, deliberately doing something every day…I don’t know…and I think we will get there as time goes on.